Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Damnedable Hats

Listen. My job is hard enough.

I mean with the stabbing and the getting stabbed and the bleeding and the being bled on...

It's hard work.

We really don't need you stupid, little adventurers messing with us and trying to make it any harder.

So, I'm in the jungle as usual, when I see this huge group of Adventurers standing around a single Mandy.

Poor bastard.

Then I notice that they're not even hitting him.

They're just standing there taunting him.

I mean, kill the guy. That's the way the game works. He shows up and you stab him to death.

That's cool.

But don't tease the little bugger. He's just doing his job.

Since I am such a thoughtful, caring goblin, I decide that I'm going to help the kid out.

And by "help the kid out" I mean "remove their spines through their nostrils."


GoblinSmithy>> Don't worry, man.
GoblinSmithy>> I've got your back.

I charge their group and start wiping them out.

I cut their White Mage down in a flash, smash a couple of Dark Knights, and then go to work on a Paladin.

GoblinSmithy>> Picking on a poor Mandy.
GoblinSmithy>> You should be ashamed of yourselves.

They were barely putting up a fight.

And then I see it...

BlackMage1 starts casting Fire IV on GoblinSmithy.

I turned fast trying to find the Black Mage. Maybe I could Rush him before he had time to cast.

But I couldn't find him.

Dammit. Where is that bastard?

GoblinSmithy>> Oh damn. I'm toast.
GoblinSmithy>> You'd better run for it, Mandy.
BlackMage1>> Why do you keep calling me Mandy?

I look down at the Mandragora. The sad, little Mandragora that I was protecting.

Funny... the Mandragora is wearing a Taru mask.


That's a Taru wearing a Mandragora hat.

GoblinSmithy>> Oh.
GoblinSmithy>> Damn.

BlackMage1 casts Fire IV on GoblinSmithy.

GoblinSmithy>> I hate you.

GoblinSmithy takes 1,367 points of damage.
GoblinSmithy was defeated by BlackMage1.

See what happens when I try to do a good deed?

Nope, that's it.

From now on, I'm sticking with the murdering. No helping.

Good samaritans tend to get burned. A lot.


Blogger Rich said...

"Good samaritans tend to get burned. A lot."

Run around invisible. Nobody will know you're there, so nobody will expect you to be a good samaritan.


What? It works for me.

5:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

lol i think there are also gobbie hats...i think it looks like pathfinder myself

5:14 PM  
Blogger WHM of Death said...

No good deed goes unpunished....but evil deeds are there own reward!!

6:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

*hides her yagudo headgear*

poor smithy--i'd advise not helping anymore mandies or beastmen >.>

1:34 AM  
Blogger Aeriel said...

O.O Smithy you poor dear {/comfort}

You know what would make you feel better i saw a crowd for taru BLM's last night all bombing mobs in besieged while the melee were trying to hold hate.. Lets just say 12 Taru BLM's (yeah i know thats a whole load of firey pain) all casting ancient magic at a mob tend to get hate away from the tank! it was a sight to behold truely. No not the death of the mob, but the Mijin Gakure of the mob as it did 4000ish damage to the entire crowd of BLM's :)


The ground was littered with burnt tarutaru corpse's you would have been in heaven :)

5:43 AM  

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