I mean with the stabbing and the getting stabbed and the bleeding and the being bled on...
It's hard work.
We really don't need you stupid, little adventurers messing with us and trying to make it any harder.
So, I'm in the jungle as usual, when I see this huge group of Adventurers standing around a single Mandy.
Then I notice that they're not even hitting him.
They're just standing there taunting him.
I mean, kill the guy. That's the way the game works. He shows up and you stab him to death.
But don't tease the little bugger. He's just doing his job.
Since I am such a thoughtful, caring goblin, I decide that I'm going to help the kid out.
And by "help the kid out" I mean "remove their spines through their nostrils."
IT'S SMITHY TIME!
GoblinSmithy>> Don't worry, man.
GoblinSmithy>> I've got your back.
I charge their group and start wiping them out.
I cut their White Mage down in a flash, smash a couple of Dark Knights, and then go to work on a Paladin.
GoblinSmithy>> Picking on a poor Mandy.
GoblinSmithy>> You should be ashamed of yourselves.
They were barely putting up a fight.
And then I see it...
BlackMage1 starts casting Fire IV on GoblinSmithy.
I turned fast trying to find the Black Mage. Maybe I could Rush him before he had time to cast.
But I couldn't find him.
Dammit. Where is that bastard?
GoblinSmithy>> Oh damn. I'm toast.
GoblinSmithy>> You'd better run for it, Mandy.
BlackMage1>> Why do you keep calling me Mandy?
I look down at the Mandragora. The sad, little Mandragora that I was protecting.
Funny... the Mandragora is wearing a Taru mask.
That's a Taru wearing a Mandragora hat.
BlackMage1 casts Fire IV on GoblinSmithy.
GoblinSmithy>> I hate you.
GoblinSmithy takes 1,367 points of damage.
GoblinSmithy was defeated by BlackMage1.
See what happens when I try to do a good deed?
Nope, that's it.
From now on, I'm sticking with the murdering. No helping.
Good samaritans tend to get burned. A lot.