Tuesday, November 07, 2006

I'm Back

Wow. That was possibly the worst week of my life.

Also, the longest.

But I'm back. I'm totally back.

Actually... I'm mostly back. I'm still missing a good deal of flesh and a few toes.

I was minding my own business in Yhoator. Yes, I know "my own business" involves stabbing people.

That's not really my problem, now is it?

Anyway, I'm working when this Warrior runs up to me. His armor looked different than the usual stuff I see, so I checked him.

Great. What in the hell does a level 36 Warrior want with me?

He couldn't possibly want to fight me because I'd still kil...

And that's when he pulled out his weapon.

GoblinSmithy>> Excuse me.
Warrior>> Yes?
GoblinSmithy>> I don't mean to be rude...
GoblinSmithy>> But why are you using a scythe?
Warrior>> Oh this thing?
Warrior>> I'm trying to raise my scythe skill.
GoblinSmithy>> Couldn't you have used a better one?
GoblinSmithy>> That thing is like level 15.
Warrior>> 14 actually.
GoblinSmithy>> Well, pardon me all to hell.

He swung back with his scythe and I closed my eyes, waiting for the blow.


No... Wait...

I think I felt a gentle breeze.

GoblinSmithy>> What was that?
Warrior>> I missed.
GoblinSmithy>> Oh, I get it.
GoblinSmithy>> You're training to be a DRK.
GoblinSmithy>> I gotcha.
Warrior>> You're going to pay for that.
GoblinSmithy>> It's okay.
GoblinSmithy>> I've got like a half hour before you swing again.
Warrior>> You think you're funny, don't you?
Warrior>> Let's see if you find this funny.

Swing and a miss.

Strike two.

GoblinSmithy>> Actually, that was kind of funny.
Warrior>> Oh, shut up.

GoblinSmithy>> Do you mind if I skill up as well?
Warrior>> Skill up?
Warrior>> Skill up what?
GoblinSmithy>> Face stabbing.
GoblinSmithy>> I'm almost capped.
Warrior>> Oh, crap.
GoblinSmithy>> They make this too easy.

RedMage starts casting Paralyze on GoblinSmithy.

GoblinSmithy>> What in the hell was that?
Warrior>> That's a friend of mine.
Warrior>> He's here to keep me alive.
GoblinSmithy>> Dammit.
Warrior>> Do I look dumb enough to fight a goblin alone?
GoblinSmithy>> Now that you mention it...

Another swing.

Another miss.

Then another swing.

Another miss.


Oh... Oh... He hit me. He hit me.

For 5 points of damage.

Yay. At this rate, I'll be dead around April.

I'm serious. He's still here right now. It's been days. He's slowly killing me.

I actually have time to write up a blog update between misses.

Hold on a second...


And there we are.

Could one of you please come out to Yhoator now and just kill me?

I'd really appreciate it.


Anonymous Anonymous said...


2:20 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry, that was me, being a retard, LOLDRK is what I ment to say.

2:22 AM  
Blogger Axit said...


2:25 AM  
Blogger Soren said...

Haha, I love when anonymous posters claim 1st post, as if anybody knows who they are.

And lol. WAR's using scythe... training to be a DRK... and missing even more than a DRK...

My heart aches to you GoblinSmithy. Really. I should just go kill you. Do you prefer Fire, Ice, or Thunder type spell? I've got other stuff too *browses through the zillions of spells a BLM has*


3:13 AM  
Blogger Argentos of Windurst said...

Sure thing, Smithy, I'll be there momentarily.

Or, if you prefer, I'll just cast Cure III on YOU instead and watch as the lolDRKWAR and his Red Mage buddy start crying. And then you can shank the lolDRKWAR while the Red Mage is busy chasing me around for being a "distraction" to his client-- I mean... friend. Yes, friend. That's the one.

3:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


6:07 AM  
Blogger Wodah said...

*finds picture of Rampage > Goblin Smithy*

8:53 AM  
Blogger Wodah said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

8:53 AM  
Blogger token black guy said...

oh im comin fa yo azz smitty! imma wiggity whoop yo a$$ holla back!

9:18 AM  
Blogger Alison the Amazing Thief said...

At least you're kind enough to kill most people fairly quickly. Boring you to death, now that's just cruel. You are dirty, and ugly, and certainly not civilized. Maybe PETA will come save youre stinky hide but I really hope not. You had this coming.

9:51 AM  
Blogger Thistle said...

Ha, that's great. I know the pain of skilling a two-handed weapon.

And I got the pack this month! First try! Yay!

11:20 AM  
Blogger Bellemithra said...


3:10 PM  

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