The Proud Papa

Okay, I've been getting this one question over and over again all week. Here's your damned answer.

YES, I HAVE A FREAKIN' CHOCOBO!

I mean, you can't walk three feet in Vana'diel these days without tripping over a chocobo egg. I figured I'd give it a shot.

If everything works out, I'll have my very own chocobo to ride around on.

If not, I'll get a free lunch out of the deal.

Chocobo>> Kweh!
GoblinSmithy>> That's great.
GoblinSmithy>> Now, get in the frying pan.

But damn those little bastards are cute. I didn't think I'd actually like the thing, but now I'm following him around and playing with him.

Shut up. Do you know how stupid you'd feel if you got your ass kicked by a Goblin walking his baby chocobo?

Unfortunately, I made the mistake of walking my new baby through Yuhtunga Jungle. Next thing I know, Pathfinder is all over me.

GoblinPathfinder>> Heya, Smitty!
GoblinPathfinder>> You got a pet!
GoblinSmithy>> Uhh... Yeah.
GoblinPathfinder>> That's so cool.
GoblinPathfinder>> He's amazing.
GoblinPathfinder>> He's incredible.
GoblinPathfinder>> What is he?
GoblinSmithy>> Sigh...
GoblinSmithy>> He's a chocobo.
GoblinPathfinder>> What's his name?
GoblinSmithy>> I don't know.
GoblinSmithy>> Who gives a damn?
GoblinSmithy>> It's just a stupid pet.
GoblinPathfinder>> ...
GoblinPathfinder>> I'll pretend I didn't hear that.
GoblinPathfinder>> You have to give him a name.
GoblinSmithy>> Okay...
GoblinSmithy>> I'll name him Stay.
GoblinPathfinder>> ... That's a funny name.
GoblinSmithy>> Wait until I try to call him.
GoblinSmithy>> "Come here, Stay! Stay! Come here!"
GoblinSmithy>> He'll have an aneurysm.
GoblinPathfinder>> You can't do that.
GoblinPathfinder>> Name him something nice.
GoblinSmithy>> How about Ravion?
GoblinPathfinder>> Better.
GoblinPathfinder>> How'd you come up with it?
GoblinSmithy>> Well, I found the egg on a corpse.
GoblinSmithy>> The corpse's name was Ravion.
GoblinSmithy>> Made sense to me.
GoblinPathfinder>> I don't like that idea either.
GoblinPathfinder>> You're not taking this seriously.
GoblinSmithy>> It would be hard to.
GoblinPathfinder>> Smitty...
GoblinSmithy>> Fine, fine.
GoblinSmithy>> How about Junior?
GoblinPathfinder>> Aww...
GoblinPathfinder>> That's cute.
GoblinPathfinder>> But why Junior?
GoblinSmithy>> Well, we think the same way.
GoblinPathfinder>> What do you mean?

That's when Junior attacked Pathfinder's face. He was screaming and squawking and flapping...

Junior was pretty excited, too.

I must admit, the little guy was really impressive. I mean, it doesn't take a lot to kill Pathfinder, but it was still amazing.

You haven't seen cute until you've seen your baby chocobo tear out someone's trachea.

Maybe I will keep him afterall.