Back To My Roots
This morning, when I was getting ready to head over to Shakrami, one of my supervisors came over to me and asked me to fill in for someone.
I said sure and then asked who I'd be replacing.
A high level Hobgoblin?
A mission NM maybe?
The Shadow Lord?
Not quite. Apparently, a Goblin Fisher had called in sick and they needed someone to cover.
Not exactly a promotion, but I was still happy.
As many of you know, I started out as a Goblin Fisher in my earlier days. I spent day after day relaxing beside shimmering pools with my fishing rod in my hand.
It was a good life. Had things not turned out the way they did, I'd probably still be there.
So, I head over to West Ronfaure, make my way to a tiny pond, and start fishing.
Damn, I missed this.
Everything was going perfectly. There were no adventurers around to bother me and I was catching a load of fish.
Then, out of the corner of my eye, I notice an Orcish Grappler.
And he's staring at me.
OrcishGrappler>> How's the fishing?
Okay, the last thing I need is to talk to some retarded orc.
I currently have neither:
a) the patience to deal with orc stupidity
b) a high enough level to grind him into a fine paste.
Seriously. Talking to an Orc is like slamming your head into a wall repeatedly.
Only less painful.
Here's a diagram of your average Orc.
So, to save myself the inevitable headache, I decided to ignore him.
OrcishGrappler>> Hello?
OrcishGrappler>> Are you there?
Just ignore him, Smithy.
Tomorrow, when you're level 30 again, you can come back and pull his spine out through his face.
For now, just ignore him.
OrcishGrappler>> Why won't you answer me?
Oh, great.
Now, he's annoying and whiny.
Just let it go, Smithy. He's not worth the trouble.
OrcishGrappler>> I knew it.
OrcishGrappler>> You're a fish botter.
OrcishGrappler>> People like you ruin the economy.
So, let me get this straight.
He knows that I'm a fish botter.
Just because I won't talk to him.
Apparently, not liking annoying morons plus fishing somehow equals fish botting.
But not only that. He knows I'm a fish botter, yet still proceeds to talk to me about being a fish botter.
That's even retarded for an orc.
OrcishGrappler>> I'm calling a GM.
I must have laughed for fiteen minutes at that one.
Imagine, getting a GM called on me because I'm ignoring an idiot.
As if anything was going to happen.
Then, about a half hour later, I'm reeling in this HUGE fish. I swear to Altana, I thought I had hooked a Goobue or something.
Then everything went dark.
When I opened my eyes, I was standing in the middle of Mordion Gaol.
And I'm staring face to face with a big, purple dragon.
GoblinSmithy>> Oh
GoblinSmithy>> Day
GoblinSmithy>> Yam
Jormungand hits GoblinSmithy for 14,006 points of damage.
GoblinSmithy was defeated by Jormungand.
Now, what the hell was this crap?
Seriously. What kind of bastard would do something that freaking insane?
[GM]Dave>> Damned botters.
I said sure and then asked who I'd be replacing.
A high level Hobgoblin?
A mission NM maybe?
The Shadow Lord?
Not quite. Apparently, a Goblin Fisher had called in sick and they needed someone to cover.
Not exactly a promotion, but I was still happy.
As many of you know, I started out as a Goblin Fisher in my earlier days. I spent day after day relaxing beside shimmering pools with my fishing rod in my hand.
It was a good life. Had things not turned out the way they did, I'd probably still be there.
So, I head over to West Ronfaure, make my way to a tiny pond, and start fishing.
Damn, I missed this.
Everything was going perfectly. There were no adventurers around to bother me and I was catching a load of fish.
Then, out of the corner of my eye, I notice an Orcish Grappler.
And he's staring at me.
OrcishGrappler>> How's the fishing?
Okay, the last thing I need is to talk to some retarded orc.
I currently have neither:
a) the patience to deal with orc stupidity
b) a high enough level to grind him into a fine paste.
Seriously. Talking to an Orc is like slamming your head into a wall repeatedly.
Only less painful.
Here's a diagram of your average Orc.
So, to save myself the inevitable headache, I decided to ignore him.
OrcishGrappler>> Hello?
OrcishGrappler>> Are you there?
Just ignore him, Smithy.
Tomorrow, when you're level 30 again, you can come back and pull his spine out through his face.
For now, just ignore him.
OrcishGrappler>> Why won't you answer me?
Oh, great.
Now, he's annoying and whiny.
Just let it go, Smithy. He's not worth the trouble.
OrcishGrappler>> I knew it.
OrcishGrappler>> You're a fish botter.
OrcishGrappler>> People like you ruin the economy.
So, let me get this straight.
He knows that I'm a fish botter.
Just because I won't talk to him.
Apparently, not liking annoying morons plus fishing somehow equals fish botting.
But not only that. He knows I'm a fish botter, yet still proceeds to talk to me about being a fish botter.
That's even retarded for an orc.
OrcishGrappler>> I'm calling a GM.
I must have laughed for fiteen minutes at that one.
Imagine, getting a GM called on me because I'm ignoring an idiot.
As if anything was going to happen.
Then, about a half hour later, I'm reeling in this HUGE fish. I swear to Altana, I thought I had hooked a Goobue or something.
Then everything went dark.
When I opened my eyes, I was standing in the middle of Mordion Gaol.
And I'm staring face to face with a big, purple dragon.
GoblinSmithy>> Oh
GoblinSmithy>> Day
GoblinSmithy>> Yam
Jormungand hits GoblinSmithy for 14,006 points of damage.
GoblinSmithy was defeated by Jormungand.
Now, what the hell was this crap?
Seriously. What kind of bastard would do something that freaking insane?
[GM]Dave>> Damned botters.
posted by Goblin Smithy at 10:06 PM
15 Comments:
Ooh, a GM Dave cameo.
Cool.
Argh, I didn't want that comment to be anonymous.
Haha, I was waiting for a Dave appearance. Nice one!
Gobave SmiGMy?
RAWR GM DAVE V GOBLIN SMITHY
FIGHT!
Exelent
Negorissimo said...
Surprise ending! ^^
If this were a comic book, this would be like a Collector's Item. Great lol
[GM]Dave has entred Smithy's life. These ARE the end times.
My money's on the Orc having already been summarily consumed by Jormy. Probably went down like this:
[GM]Dave: Hail, ... NPC?
[GM]Dave: ...the hell?
Orcish Grappler: There's a fishbot in West Ronfaure!
[GM]Dave: uuuuh-kay... you're an orc. What the hell do you care if a player is fishbotting? Just go kill him.
Orcish Grappler: There's no PvP. I can't attack a Goblin Fisher.
[GM]Dave: They're not a player?
[GM]Dave: You called me away from bottle #10 because you think a Goblin is botting?
Orcish Grappler: You're drinking on the job?
[GM]Dave: You're not?
Orcish Grappler: Hey! Why am I in Mordian Gaol?
Orcish Grappler: Oh, Hi! Jormungand.
Jormungand hits Orcish Grappler for 15,652 points of damage.
Revenge for being called a Prick, I, personally, would have banned you. But I do agree, who the hell would want to talk to a Retarded Orc.
I liked the diagram of the orc as well. Nice work.
Nice. :D
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