Smithy Goes To Limbus
I was rather bored today, so I spent most of the morning trying to figure out what to do.
Let's look at my options:
1) Regular duty in Yuhtunga/Yhoator Jungle
I'd rather stab myself in the eye.
I love the jungles. I really do. The smell of fear in the air is quite nice in the Spring.
But if I have to see one more level 29 WAR/ level 10 WHM trying to hit 30 just to get an advanced job, I'm going to scream.
Seriously. One match and the whole place goes up.
2) Garrison
Yay! I can get gang raped with weapons!
How about no?
3) Dynamis
My flesh is feeling a little too non-charred lately. Plus, the nurses on the burn ward are damned cute.
But I'm thinking I can live without being liquified for another day.
Hmm...
So what does that leave me?
4) Limbus
I haven't actually done Limbus yet, but I've heard good things.
Of course, I heard them from Shaman, the same moron who convinced me to try Garrison.
Note to self: hurt Shaman.
But, because I had nothing better to do, I signed up for Limbus.
I need to get a hobby.
So, I get suited up and ready to go, then head over to catch a warp to Tenemos North. And, as usual, who shows up but Shaman and Pathfinder.
GoblinShaman>> Hi, Smithy.
GoblinPathfinder>> Heya, Smitty.
GoblinSmithy>> Hey, Shaman.
GoblinPathfinder>> Heya, Smitty.
GoblinSmithy>> I heard you the first time.
GoblinPathfinder>> You didn't say hi.
GoblinSmithy>> And?
GoblinSmithy>> Hey look! A path!
GoblinPathfinder>> Where?
*punch in the back of head*
GoblinSmithy>> I hope this is a quick trip.
That's when I find out we can't warp directly there.
Yay.
Do I look like someone who enjoys hiking? Do I really?
I realize I may seem like the outdoors type because I spend so much time in the jungle, but I'm honestly not. That's part of the job.
If I could find a job terrorizing n00bs and murdering White Mages in a mall, I'd never go outside again.
A metal subligar gets cold, you know.
So, when they told me we had to catch a Tele-Holla and walk from there, I was pissed.
But money is money. I've got to get some extra hours to cover my WoW account.
And off we went.
We catch a Tele-Holla and already I'm annoyed. Damned Leecher charging me 1000 gil.
The hike probably wouldn't be so bad if Pathfinder hadn't gotten us lost three times.
GoblinSmithy>> I thought you were good with paths.
GoblinPathfinder>> I only find them.
GoblinSmithy>> Just when I thought you had a purpose.
GoblinPathfinder>> Hey look!
GoblinSmithy>> Don't do it.
GoblinPathfinder>> A path!
GoblinSmithy>> Are there any adventurers around?
GoblinSmithy>> I could really go for a sword to the brain right now.
We finally make our way to Tenemos North and I must say I was impressed.
GoblinSmithy>> Sweet.
GoblinSmithy>> Where's camp?
GoblinShaman>> We're on the seventh floor.
GoblinSmithy>> Cool.
GoblinSmithy>> Where's the elevator?
GoblinShaman>> What elevator?
GoblinSmithy>> ...
GoblinSmithy>> I'm going to murder you with your own face.
Seven floors and no elevator.
Note to self: start organizing revolution.
So we trudge up 7 flights of stairs. By the time I get to the top, my heart is ready to explode.
And then they hand me a treasure chest to carry.
Yes, you read that right. A FREAKIN' TREASURE CHEST!
GoblinSmithy>> You've got to be kidding.
GoblinSmithy>> What the hell is this for?
GoblinShaman>> The adventurers are going to kill you to get it.
GoblinSmithy>> Hey, Pathfinder.
GoblinSmithy>> Want a treasure chest?
GoblinShaman>> Sorry, man. That one's yours.
GoblinSmithy>> Do we have any plans where I don't get killed?
GoblinSmithy>> We need to get a committee on that.
So we wait.
And wait.
And wait.
Did I mention the waiting?
I'm just getting ready to give up when a huge group of adventurers barrels in.
We go to quick work and they start to lose health fast. This was gonna be easier than I thought.
And then a Ninja got a lucky shot in on me and I dropped my treasure chest.
On my toe.
><;
Just as the pain was starting to recede, a Red Mage runs up and opens my chest.
And their entire party gets back full hp and mp.
Well FREAKIN' Perfect!
After that, we didn't have a chance. We got wiped out.
Luckily, I got to see Pathfinder get killed before me.
Thank Altana for small favors.
And just as I'm about to die, I hear the damned Red Mage say
RedMage>> Well that was a lot of work for nothing.
Glad we could be of service, Bastard.
I hate limbus.
Let's look at my options:
1) Regular duty in Yuhtunga/Yhoator Jungle
I'd rather stab myself in the eye.
I love the jungles. I really do. The smell of fear in the air is quite nice in the Spring.
But if I have to see one more level 29 WAR/ level 10 WHM trying to hit 30 just to get an advanced job, I'm going to scream.
Seriously. One match and the whole place goes up.
2) Garrison
Yay! I can get gang raped with weapons!
How about no?
3) Dynamis
My flesh is feeling a little too non-charred lately. Plus, the nurses on the burn ward are damned cute.
But I'm thinking I can live without being liquified for another day.
Hmm...
So what does that leave me?
4) Limbus
I haven't actually done Limbus yet, but I've heard good things.
Of course, I heard them from Shaman, the same moron who convinced me to try Garrison.
Note to self: hurt Shaman.
But, because I had nothing better to do, I signed up for Limbus.
I need to get a hobby.
So, I get suited up and ready to go, then head over to catch a warp to Tenemos North. And, as usual, who shows up but Shaman and Pathfinder.
GoblinShaman>> Hi, Smithy.
GoblinPathfinder>> Heya, Smitty.
GoblinSmithy>> Hey, Shaman.
GoblinPathfinder>> Heya, Smitty.
GoblinSmithy>> I heard you the first time.
GoblinPathfinder>> You didn't say hi.
GoblinSmithy>> And?
GoblinSmithy>> Hey look! A path!
GoblinPathfinder>> Where?
*punch in the back of head*
GoblinSmithy>> I hope this is a quick trip.
That's when I find out we can't warp directly there.
Yay.
Do I look like someone who enjoys hiking? Do I really?
I realize I may seem like the outdoors type because I spend so much time in the jungle, but I'm honestly not. That's part of the job.
If I could find a job terrorizing n00bs and murdering White Mages in a mall, I'd never go outside again.
A metal subligar gets cold, you know.
So, when they told me we had to catch a Tele-Holla and walk from there, I was pissed.
But money is money. I've got to get some extra hours to cover my WoW account.
And off we went.
We catch a Tele-Holla and already I'm annoyed. Damned Leecher charging me 1000 gil.
The hike probably wouldn't be so bad if Pathfinder hadn't gotten us lost three times.
GoblinSmithy>> I thought you were good with paths.
GoblinPathfinder>> I only find them.
GoblinSmithy>> Just when I thought you had a purpose.
GoblinPathfinder>> Hey look!
GoblinSmithy>> Don't do it.
GoblinPathfinder>> A path!
GoblinSmithy>> Are there any adventurers around?
GoblinSmithy>> I could really go for a sword to the brain right now.
We finally make our way to Tenemos North and I must say I was impressed.
GoblinSmithy>> Sweet.
GoblinSmithy>> Where's camp?
GoblinShaman>> We're on the seventh floor.
GoblinSmithy>> Cool.
GoblinSmithy>> Where's the elevator?
GoblinShaman>> What elevator?
GoblinSmithy>> ...
GoblinSmithy>> I'm going to murder you with your own face.
Seven floors and no elevator.
Note to self: start organizing revolution.
So we trudge up 7 flights of stairs. By the time I get to the top, my heart is ready to explode.
And then they hand me a treasure chest to carry.
Yes, you read that right. A FREAKIN' TREASURE CHEST!
GoblinSmithy>> You've got to be kidding.
GoblinSmithy>> What the hell is this for?
GoblinShaman>> The adventurers are going to kill you to get it.
GoblinSmithy>> Hey, Pathfinder.
GoblinSmithy>> Want a treasure chest?
GoblinShaman>> Sorry, man. That one's yours.
GoblinSmithy>> Do we have any plans where I don't get killed?
GoblinSmithy>> We need to get a committee on that.
So we wait.
And wait.
And wait.
Did I mention the waiting?
I'm just getting ready to give up when a huge group of adventurers barrels in.
We go to quick work and they start to lose health fast. This was gonna be easier than I thought.
And then a Ninja got a lucky shot in on me and I dropped my treasure chest.
On my toe.
><;
Just as the pain was starting to recede, a Red Mage runs up and opens my chest.
And their entire party gets back full hp and mp.
Well FREAKIN' Perfect!
After that, we didn't have a chance. We got wiped out.
Luckily, I got to see Pathfinder get killed before me.
Thank Altana for small favors.
And just as I'm about to die, I hear the damned Red Mage say
RedMage>> Well that was a lot of work for nothing.
Glad we could be of service, Bastard.
I hate limbus.
posted by Goblin Smithy at 11:54 PM
9 Comments:
You can join my revolution. It's not like I can be picky. Your monsterous habits of killing adventurers could come in handy.
haha keep em comming XD
If it makes you feel better any smithy I'll charge Pathfinder 5 times the going price for a tele next time
ps. i charged him 3,000 gil for that trip to Holla
What? Some of you guys still teleport Pathfinder? At least dump him in Altepa or something. It's hot as hell there and not a path for miles, haha!
LOL U guys R Funny :p
"Yay! I can get gang raped with weapons!"
I love weapons!
Do you think I can add Goblin Pathfinder to my friend list? Sometimes I get lost and he seems really nice.
Just wondering Smithy, did the Ninja had a good luck shot or you were too busy starring at the booby she popped from her Scorpion Harness? >.>
Also, did you keep some of the Ancient beastcoins (they are quite expensive, around 150k a piece) or you got screwed by thfs too?
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