Monday, April 17, 2006

Don't Hate the Game. Hate the Player.

You.

Yes, I'm talking to you.

I don't like you.

Why is it that I can't have just one day of peace and quiet? Not one.

No. People just like you have to do stupid things and make me have to do extra work. Always with the running and the chasing and the stabbing.

Stabbin' ain't easy, yo.

Okay, here's a list of things you can do to NOT piss me off in future:

a) Don't run in front of me. Ever. Ever ever.

You run in front of me and I have to chase you. It's my job. But now, I'm running after you in hot, heavy (and very painfully chafing) armor.

That's not good for anyone. I'm getting uncomfortable and I'm going to have to beat you extra hard for making me uncomfortable.

b) If you do run in front of me, just freakin' die.

Seriously. Stand still and die. You're not going to make it to the zoneline.

Just man up and take one for the team (read: me). Do not attempt to run away.

But since you wimps always run, let's just move on, shall we?

c) If you do attempt to run away, take your damned party with you.

Honestly. Just take your whole damn group with you. All of them.

Yes, even the Galka.

If you don't, then as soon as you die, I have to walk all the way back to your camp to kill them.

Earlier today, I was on duty in Yhoator Jungle in front of a cave a little way away from the zonelines. You know, very few people around.

I'm just starting to think that I might actually get a day's vacation from the usual adventurer stupidity, when a party runs by me and into the cave.

Annoyance level: 13%

I try to ignore them and relax, but then the Thief has to walk right in front of me.

So, I start swinging and, of course, he starts running (they always run) for the zoneline.

But his party waits.

The Thief makes it pretty far, I will give him. I mean, it must be hard to run with an iron sword imbedded in your spine.

Then, I have to walk all the damned way back to his party.

Annoyance level: 29%

I finally get back and what happens? The first guy I aggro takes off running.

So, now I have to chase him toward the zoneline.

And his party waits.

Annoyance level: 41%

He dies a little faster than the Thief, but I'm still a good ways away from their camp.

Sigh.

I walk all the way back again and what happens? As soon as I aggro the Monk, he takes off running.

AND HIS PARTY WAITS.

Annoyance level: 74%

Oh, that's freaking it. I'd had it. I cut that Monk up proper.

But I didn't walk straight back.

Oh no.

I took a stroll through some nearby tunnels and found a few friends.

Friends that link.

I then waited for the dead players to get raised and make it back to camp. They must suffer, as well.


My friends (read: sword toting army) and I walk quickly to their camp. Just as we're about to turn the last corner, I overhear them talking.

(Monk) Did you guys see that stupid Gobby?
(Thief) Yeah. What an idiot.
(White Mage) And damn he was ugly.

I hope they saw my smile before 87 Goblin Smithys charged around the turn and ground them into a fine paste.

Maybe next time, they'll be more careful NOT TO PISS ME OFF.

Damn, this subligar chafes a lot.

6 Comments:

Anonymous Fauxylady said...

I do it simply because I enjoy being irritating.Now that I know what irritates you, i'll make sure to get my entire LS to help me next time oi'm on, and irritate you to the point of a complete mental breakdown.

An insane goblin, now there would be a fun enemy.

3:02 AM  
Anonymous An Anonymous Fan said...

Smithy, stab the lady and her pals.

Thank you.

I like reading about [GM]Dave's and your day.

3:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

^ same... Brings a smile to my face...

4:04 AM  
Blogger Curse said...

"Honestly. Just take your whole damn group with you. All of them.

Yes, even the Galka"

Ha! This rocks nards off.

10:28 AM  
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8:05 PM  

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