Huked awn fonix wurked 4 mee
I mean aside from the obvious.
Were some of you scared by a grammar book as a child?
Are you somehow allergic to proper spelling?
ARE YOU FUNCTIONALLY RETARDED?
If I have to listen to one more of you idiotic adventurers butchering your own language, you won't have to worry about fighting me.
I'll just kill myself.
Seriously, you cannot imagine the sheer frustration that comes with watching you people massacre a sentence.
I could give an Orc a dictionary and he'd make more sense that most of you.
And that's saying something.
What the hell is "lol"?
I know what it means, you morons.
I mean what kind of absolute asshead would say that?
Some of you even say it in real life. Out loud.
That's actually a justification for murder in some states.
And what about "sum"?
Is it really that difficult to type out "some"?
Perhaps you are trying to ration what few IQ points you have so you have to use as few letters as possible.
Or maybe you are just too damned busy to type ONE EXTRA LETTER.
I'm not being mean when I kill you.
I'm doing the world a service.
I should win the Nobel FRICKIN' Peace Prize.
You people actually deserve to die for your crimes against the english language.
Then there's "w".
That's just going too far.
I mean, brutalizing your own language is one thing. But picking on another language?
That's just wrong.
What did Japanese ever do to you?
I don't care how much anime (read: hentai) you watch, you're still not Japanese.
Oh, your "girlfriend" is Japanese.
You're still retarded.
(On a side note: that girl you stare at during math class does not qualify as your girlfriend)
There's no need to use "w". Just write "Haha".
It's not that hard. It's the sound laughing actually makes.
You should recognize it from the last time you asked out a girl.
You cannot begin to imagine how much I despise the cretins who actually talk like this. Especially during a fight.
Today was the last straw. I had just spent the entire morning fighting the dregs of the mental barrel, when I got attacked by someone who I can only assume was struck in the head as a child.
With a brick.
As I did not have a brick, I decided a sword might make a nice alternative.
Player>> (( Fishing )) ---> GoblinSmithy <>
Player>> come and get sum of dis.
GoblinSmithy>> What the hell was that?
GoblinSmithy>> Or that?
Player>> wut do u mean?
GoblinSmithy>> He's trying to communicate with me.
GoblinSmithy>> I can tell.
GoblinSmithy>> HELLO THERE.
GoblinSmithy>> WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
Player>> dammed goblin
GoblinSmithy>> Funny... you don't look like a goblin.
Player>> u gonna die
GoblinSmithy>> That's it.
GoblinSmithy>> Use your words.
Player>> SHUT UP U ASSFACE
GoblinSmithy>> Bad Player!!
GoblinSmithy>> Those words are bad.
Player>> oh ur gonna pay 4 that.
GoblinSmithy>> You're bad at english and math.
Player>> u sonuvabitch
GoblinSmithy>> You're German now?
GoblinSmithy>> Could we massacre one language at a time please?
Player>> I HATE U!!!
GoblinSmithy>> We were so close that time!
After that he got even harder to understand (if you can believe it).
His pathetic attempts at language devolved into a barely recognizable pattern of grunts and moans.
It was like feeding time at the zoo.
As the fight wore on, it became readily apparent that he was not going to survive.
Darwinism at work, people.
GoblinSmithy>> As funny as this is...
GoblinSmithy>> I'm afraid I have to kill you now.
Player>> $%^& u, u $%^&ing Goblin.
GoblinSmithy>> Don't you find it ironic...
GoblinSmithy>> That I speak better english than you?
GoblinSmithy>> I rest my case.
I felt a little bad about killing someone who was so obviously mentally handicapped.
Luckily, I stabbed him in the brain, so it's not like I damaged anything he was using.
Honestly, I beg of you people. Learn to use your own damned language.
It's getting very sad.
Actually... it's much worse than sad.
Is pathetisad a word?
Oh wait... look who I'm asking.