Wednesday, March 29, 2006

I have feelings too, you know.

It's not like I want to be popular. I'm the quote unquote "bad guy." I get that.

But some damned recognition might be nice.

Everytime I camp in Maze of Shakrami, I never get any attention. Oh no, everyone is looking for Argus. Argus this, Argus that.

It makes me sick.

Have you even seen that guy? He's a blob of goo with about 100 eyes. He's an eye-bally gooey blob. I'm decked out in seriously cool armor and the gooball gets all the attention.

HE DOESN'T EVEN HAVE LEGS.

And don't even get me started about when he gets to the bathroom ahead of me. Yesterday morning, I had to wait while he put in his contacts. By the time he was done, I had to shave again.

What does he even need contacts for? As soon as he logs in, he gets stabbed to death. It's a waste of saline, is what it is.

The guy only shows up once a day for Altana's sake. Damned primadonna.

Must... control... rage.

I'm getting sidetracked.

So, I'm in Shakrami looking for some adventurers to exp off of, but the only adventurers there are waiting for Argus. *coughbastardcough*

I'm just getting sick of waiting around when a Dark Knight finally walks up to me and takes a swing.

Finally!

So I get to work. I'm ducking and weaving. I mean, I'm pulling out all of my best moves. This punk is gonna...

...stand there not moving.

He's not fighting back. Hell, he's not even looking at me. He's just waiting...

FOR ARGUS.

I've gone from being an intimidating omen of death to being a source of amusement.

This will not do.

So, I wait. And wait. And wait. And then it happens.

Mister too-cool-for-school Argus shows up. The place just goes bat shit insane. People start warping and casting, provoking and chi-blasting. The Dark Knight starts casting...

And at that exact second, I stab him right in the groin.

I mean, I stabbed that guy. I smashed that thing like Mark McGwire. His grandkids are going to be cross-eyed. I swear I heard one of them pop.

Who needs a Peacock Amulet now, bitch?

5 Comments:

Blogger WindexHamster said...

HOLY SHIT!

Reading that, I laughed so hard I almost spit my sandwich straight through my monitor.

7:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

And don't even get me started about when he gets to the bathroom ahead of me. Yesterday morning, I had to wait while he put in his contacts. By the time he was done, I had to shave again.


Worst pun ever XD but i still love you <3

Aretha ˆ_ˆ

7:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Mister too-cool-for-school Argus shows up. The place just goes bat shit insane. People start warping and casting, provoking and chi-blasting. The Dark Knight starts casting..."

That's some cool rapping shit Smithy

11:12 PM  
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8:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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11:26 AM  

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